yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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