I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
