How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
