So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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