i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
