come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
