I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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