The best revenge is premature balding
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
