walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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