whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
The ass gains better be worth it
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