the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
