Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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