All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize