And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
