White coat. Heels.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
