id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize