I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
