Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.

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(727): View more from Florida

im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens

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(210): View more from Texas

Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".

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(330): View more from Ohio

we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it

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(302): View more from Delaware

the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark

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(703): View more from Virginia

I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.

(757): View more from Virginia

you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.

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(480): View more from Arizona

Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.

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(224): View more from Illinois

only 4 hours until nug lovin time

(616): View more from Michigan

excuse me?

(224): View more from Illinois

nug lovin. lovin nugs.

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