:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
