I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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