then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
