What did we do last night that was yellow?
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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