dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
