im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
