How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Randomize
