Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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