is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
You're a waste of cheezeits
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
