i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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