Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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