dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
