so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
