YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
