well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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