i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
