I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You made out with two different species that night
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
