? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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