You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
