at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
