My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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