Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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