Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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