he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
It was like getting head from an anaconda
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
