So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
