it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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