i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Panties = found
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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