Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
