So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
