Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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