My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
my poor anus
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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