dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
